[Buddha-l] Being in Love

[[DPD Web] Shen Shi'an]

"Worldly" as in "not spiritual"...
Eg. I love you because you

a) look beautiful
b) love me
c) are rich
d) is a great sex partner
e) for your fame

The above are all worldly and thus transient conditions (similar to the
eight worldly conditions). For spiritual love, it's unconditional - with
characteristics like that described in the Metta Sutta.

Thich Nhat Hanh neatly explains the Buddhist concept of "True Love" as
all four Brahma Viharas combined. Here's a simple summary from
http://moonpointer.com/index.php?itemid=2011 -

Loving-kindness: May all be happy.
Compassion: May all not be unhappy.
Appreciative Joy: May all be happy others are happy.
Equanimity: May all be equally happy.

Equanimity is sometimes thought of as the spreading thinly of the butter
of "love", but the Brahma Viharas are supposed to be immeasurable.
There's always enough "love" to go around for all :-]

-----Original Message-----
From: jkirk [mailto:jkirk at spro.net] 
Sent: Wednesday, 20 February, 2008 11:11 AM
To: 'Buddhist discussion forum'
Subject: RE: [Buddha-l] Being in Love

"Think it's okay that the love is worldly at first, as long as it
transforms
in good time to be pure."
Would you please expand on what you mean by "worldly" love?
Thanks,
JK
=========== 

On Behalf Of [DPD Web] Shen Shi'an
Sent: Tuesday, February 19, 2008 7:57 PM

..........
When both are faithful and generous,
Self-restrained, of righteous living,
They come together as husband and wife.
Full of love for each other.

Many blessings come their way,
They dwell together in happiness,
Their enemies are left dejected,
When both are equal in virtue.

Having lived by Dhamma in this world,
The same in virtue and observance,
They rejoice after death in the deva-world, Enjoying abundant happiness.

(AN 4:55,II 61-62) -  In the Buddha's Words, p.121-122

Think it's okay that the love is worldly at first, as long as it
transforms
in good time to be pure. (That seems the point of the passage.) Most
folks
can't make a quantum leap from conditional love of one (of a few) to
unconditional {Bodhisattva-like) love of all beings. We all gotta start
somewhere, just like Metta is first radiated inward to oneself, before
to
all beings :-]

The Buddha clearly knew that it is not easy for most to be ready for a
spiritual life that fully relinquishes worldly love. While the Buddha
praised ideal matrimonial bliss, he also skilfully urged spiritual
cultivation (as above)- which would gradually lessen worldliness of the
relationship. Mutually supportive of each other's spiritual life, Prince
Siddhartha himself is said to had partnered Princess Yashodhara for some
500
past lives, before becoming the Buddha, thereafter guiding her to be an
Arahant! 

Does your love in Samsara embrace Samsara tighter, or does it loosens
its
grip? - Stonepeace


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