[Buddha-l] Is polyamory kilesa?

[Piya Tan]

The Commentaries explain that a garlanded girl mentioned above refers to one
betrothed to be married (engaged) to the man.

Piya



On 5/21/07, Vicente Gonzalez <vicen.bcn at gmail.com> wrote:
>
> Christopher wrote:
>
> CF> Polyandry was fairly common in parts of Tibet and polygamy in parts
> CF> of Bhutan. In both cases one of the main reasons seems to have been to
> prevent
> CF> the breakup of ancestral land.
>
> at least I understand kilesas are not directly related with polyamory
> Neither having multiple sex partners doesn't have to do with adultery
> in a direct way.
>
> In the sex misconduct topic, many people manage the strange
> commentaries of Buddhaghosa, despite they are really bizarre.
> Probably still are useful for somebody.
>
> But at least to me, the following sounds more clear, simple, and
> definitive:
>
> AN 10.176
> "And how is one made pure in three ways by bodily action? There is the
> case where a certain person, abandoning the taking of life, abstains
> from the taking of life. He dwells with his rod laid down, his knife
> laid down, scrupulous, merciful, compassionate for the welfare of all
> living beings. Abandoning the taking of what is not given, he abstains
> from taking what is not given. He does not take, in the manner of a
> thief, things in a village or a wilderness that belong to others and
> have not been given by them. Abandoning sensual misconduct, he
> abstains from sensual misconduct. He does not get sexually involved
> with those who are protected by their mothers, their fathers, their
> brothers, their sisters, their relatives, or their Dhamma; those with
> husbands, those who entail punishments, or even those crowned with
> flowers by another man. This is how one is made pure in three ways by
> bodily action."
>
> central point seems to be not damaging other being who already is
> involved in a relation of love and care, because from here there is
> a feeling of protection (or property) which must be respected.
> Perhaps from damaging this feeling then arises serious troubles.
>
> Specially interesting is the line "even those crowned with flowers by
> another man". I'm ignorant of the exact meaning but, It isn't a
> mention to homosexuality?. In this case, it can invalidate the
> bizarre Buddhagosa comments about anal sex, because it implies the
> existence of a right sex behavior for homosexuals not related with
> any body orifice, which is a complete absurdity.
>
> Although maybe the meaning of that phrase is another one. Perhaps some
> Pali expert can say something. I have never read any explanation of
> this interesting phrase.
>
> The "French" (universal?) case of a shared acceptance of adultery
> that Joanna wrote sounds more problematic.
>
> Anyway, it seems that having multiple partners doesn't have to do with
> sex misconduct in a direct way, Some people can have sex in group
> and in common agreement and they can be well and happy. Specially when
> the bed is enough large.
>
>
> best regards,
>
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