[Buddha-l] The Dalai Lama on Self-Loathing

[jkirk]

I must differ on these two psychological situations: Lack of self-esteem is
not at all the same as self-loathing. 
The latter is deeply pervasive and much more negative and destructive to
one's self-concept than lack of self-esteem, which can be helped fairly
easily in school or in therapy, as compared to help with the other ailment
(disposition, attitude).
Joanna
==================== 

-----Original Message-----
From: buddha-l-bounces at mailman.swcp.com
[mailto:buddha-l-bounces at mailman.swcp.com] On Behalf Of RonLeifer at aol.com
Sent: Saturday, June 30, 2007 1:20 PM
To: buddha-l at mailman.swcp.com
Subject: Re: [Buddha-l] The Dalai Lama on Self-Loathing

 
In a message dated 6/30/2007 12:00:07 P.M. Pacific Daylight Time,
jkirk at spro.net writes:

I recall  Tai Situ Rinpoche being asked the same question. He also had a
difficult  time understanding self  loathing. He said he had been asked  the
question often, had thought  about it deeply, and come to the  conclusion
that self loathing is disappointment with one's self, secondary  to
unrealistic expectations.



I think Tai Situ had remarkable insight. The aversion to anything is
dialectically associated with the desire for it to be different. Self
loathing,  or as mental health people call it, "low self esteem" is, in my
view, disappointment in one's self secondary to high and unrealistic
expectations.  Self esteem is not an inherent unitary feeling. It is
dialectical, or dualistic, reflecting the dualistic nature of discursive
mind. Perhaps the Tibetans are not  as vulnerable to it because they don't
suffer from the idea of progress, anomie, overweening ambition and
unrealistic expectations from  life and one's  self promoted by  western
culture.
 
Ron Leifer



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