[Buddha-l] An experiment (Gender on Buddha-l)

[jkirk]

>
> Joanna, you know I always love your posts.  And as a self-respecting 
> egalitarian, there is part of me that always gets a charge out of 
> defending a woman who is arguing against ten men, or a person of color who 
> is arguing against ten whites, or a gay or lesbian person who is arguing 
> against ten heterosexuals.  But I've never let my self-respect stop me 
> from expressing uninformed opinions before, and I see no reason to start 
> now.
>
>
> Cheers,
>
> TH
===================
Hi Tom,
First off, I want to underline that my views have been misrepresented by a 
few of the more more chauvinist members here, in that I do NOT promote 
wholesale either/or dichotomies of male vs female, and I am not a rampaging 
feminist. In fact, I personally am somewhat androgynous in my behavioral 
preferences and views. I am instead an observer of cultural values in 
action, society in action, and human behavior in general. I've already 
stated my position on the socio/cultural construction of behavior and views 
and the huge literature available on this subject, and won't repeat it here. 
But I do know what gender oppression and manipulation is, based on my own 
experience and that of other women whom I've
known over the years.  I have contrary to what some here think been framing 
my critique of behavior on this list as CULTURAL gender behavior, not just 
gender behavior, because that gets back to genetic determinism.
Whatever behavior is genetically determined is still, IMO, controversial, 
although some aspects are getting to be more persuasive, e.g., along the 
lines of how children of each gender tend to communicate differently. Such 
differences tend to persist into adulthood,  like the way some men (several 
on this list for example) love to yuck it up horsing around, pretending that 
teasing and hazing are great ways to "develop trustworthy character."  LOL 
The style of this list is indeed a US male gendered cultural style, as you 
and Franz have also pointed out.
What I am calling for in general is not stilted behavior but civility, 
that's all, just good old civility. Believe it or not, men are perfectly 
capable of being civil too. Civility is one way to begin being compassionate 
because it allows everyone into the charmed circle instead of the usual 
route here of incivility, which creates nastiness and dukkha. All action has 
consequences, as we Buddhists are accustomed to pointing out....the 
consequences of civility are far more beneficial to all and, IMO, to the 
general purpose of the list than those of incivility. Q.E.D. folks.
Joanna